6/9/12

Cheney Receives Heart Transplant From Short Round

Cheney Receives Heart Transplant

3/24/2012

At 71 years of age, former Vice President Dick Cheney received a full organ heart transplant from his unwilling eleven-year old Chinese Sherpa Short Round, at the Experimental Hospital of Dark Side Medicine. Head Cardiac Surgeon and High Priest Mola Ram says the American dignitary and dedicated supplicant to the War Goddess Kali is in good spirits and relatively good health. Brief services for Short Round were held at a hidden location under the Temple of Doom. Officials at the International Criminal Court were overjoyed to hear that now they had a possible ten more years to bring War Crime charges against Cheney.

In related news, former President Jimmy Carter is asking The Wizard for a transplant of courage, and former President George W. Bush is requesting a brain. Emerald City Officials would not comment on their relative positions on the Organ Donor Lists, but indicated that Carter’s transplant would certainly be easier, as his soul is so much wider than Bush’s skull.